Now who knew there’d be such a big problem having happiness come to you?
Who knew that sex would destroy us?

And when you saw that my fur was on fire
Why didn’t you avert your eyes?

Ooh I’m a rhino watching you as you discover
You call me horny and you giggle

And you steal my photograph while I eat grass

From your warped perspective I take shelter behind the tall grass
And summer comes late this year
and so what your doing you’re messing with my head
Snapping photographs
I’m no dumb giraffe, I’m nothing special

And if you were the last white tiger on the face of this earth
I’d be the last abstinent female white tiger
You can live your life lonely like a lonely old tiger on the mountain top Come down, Calm down
Come down from the mountain hard as a tumbling boulder

Fall where you may I’m gonna offer you

National Geographic centerfolds
They can try but they won’t bring me down

Kibbles n’ bits and your big mamas tits and penthouse downtown
Paint up your body drink a hot toddy come and see us sometime soon

Well we love the way you look at us but don’t look back
Don’t fuckin’ feed the animals, how about that ??

Look how thin I got since they don’t feed me squat
Nobody’s watching if you’ve got food

Whoah look at me I’m playin’ in the water
Ducks and penguins have a real good time

And when you saw that my fur was on fire
And my loins were burning with animal lust
For the fruit of us

The cheap desire to fill up the nursery
The badger lays his hands on the porcupine
I’m hungry
Starving sexually
My dog got ran over
My mama just died
What can you say?
One went for a little bit longer ride

Now and then I’m reminded of each of them by fleas
Birds fucking bees
Stranger things have happened

Down on my knees
Scooping up a bats hand with a napkin
While I’m napping
Or was it just a dream of mine ?

Unicorns resist existence
Their persistence is ridiculous
Just like this

And who knew the problems with sleeping out on the street?
And all the animals going in and out of heat

And the full moon comes around and my dog starts to howl
And meets a neighbor dog and the bitch gets fucked til’ who knows when?
I can’t sleep out here again

‘fore my mama said I’m a make man of you
She didn’t know what I already knew
Swinging crazy
Impossible baby
What you know about a crocodile monkey ?

‘fore my mama said I’m a make man of you
She didn’t know what I already knew
Swinging crazy
Impossible baby
What you know about a crocodile monkey?

My mom said I’d suffer the fate of the damned
if I didn’t keep my hands to myself
but touching came so natural the animals just hated me